


Atonement

by FifiandBogart



Category: Matilda (1996)
Genre: F/F, LGBT, Lesbians
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-04
Updated: 2019-09-05
Packaged: 2020-04-07 21:21:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 10,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19093378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FifiandBogart/pseuds/FifiandBogart
Summary: 1 year after Ms. Honey officially adopted Matilda, their lives are suddenly interrupted by an unexpected turn of events!





	1. Chapter 1

It had been 1 year to the day since Ms. Honey had officially adopted Matilda, and their lives had been filled with more healing love and joy than either thought possible. Ms. Honey knew she wanted to do something very special for her special little daughter, but nothing she could think of seemed good enough. Deciding to settle on making Matilda an evening meal with all her favorites, she dropped her off at the library for awhile so she could get started on the surprise. A few hours later, all the food was cooked and ready to eat, so Ms. Honey picked Matilda up while everything cooled.

All the hard work she did was worth it when Matilda walked into the kitchen and her face lit up like the sun. After profuse thanks and a big hug, they sat down to enjoy. It was such a delicious treat that they barely even stopped to chat. As soon as they finished with the last couple bites on their plates, an unexpected knock on the door filled them both with surprise and they exchanged confused glances.

"Are we expecting company tonight...?" Matilda asked quietly.

Ms. Honey furrowed her brow and shook her head nervously. Ever since her Aunt Trunchbull was run out of town, she was perpetually worried that she would return to continue her reign of terror and abuse, starting with taking over the house again.

"Wait here, sweetheart. I'll go see who it is."

Ms. Honey fought to keep her voice even, but she wasn't able to stop the shaking in her limbs as she stood up and made her way toward the door. Curiosity was too much for Matilda and she couldn't stay put, so she followed behind a few steps.

They both held their breath instinctively as Ms. Honey turned the knob.

What was on the other side of the door would turn their lives upside down and change them forever.


	2. Chapter 2

Mrs. Wormwood stood in front of them, hardly recognizable with a pixie cut and no make-up. It took all of Ms. Honey's good nature not to slam the door back in her face, fearing that she was here to fight for Matilda back.

"M-MOM?!" Matilda exclaimed in shock, flinching as soon as the word left her mouth.

She looked up at Ms. Honey, guilt clear in her expression for referring to her previous guardian with that title. Ms. Honey placed a gentle hand on the top of her head to show there were no hard feelings, all the while keeping her gaze fixed on Mrs. Wormwood. The teacher-turned-principal was not quite as timid as she once was, and she refused to give up her sunshine without a fight.

"May I ask what you're doing here?"

The bite in her voice caused Mrs. Wormwood to raise her hands in surrender.

"Hey now. Whatever you're thinking, I can promise you that that's not why I'm here... Hi again, Matilda..."

Her voice was tender and soft and genuine while she spoke and it caught Ms. Honey completely off guard. If she didn't know any better, she'd think that she saw Mrs. Wormwood's eyes sparkle with loving recognition as she looked at the young girl. The shrill, unpleasant woman she knew before seemed to be gone, transformed completely.

"I... I know it's a long shot, but do you think I could come inside for a quick chat? I won't take up too much of your time."

"Oh... Well, I don't know... We're just finishing up with our supper."

"Ah, yes... Of course, silly me... It is about that time, isn't it? Well, you see... I'm very sorry to impose... The only thing is... I don't really have anywhere else to go... I came straight here because I remembered the address... The thing is... I left Harry... AND his dirty money!!"


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to start referring to Ms. Honey and Mrs. Wormwood by their first names now: Jennifer/Jen and Zinnia in case you didn't know :)

After Zinnia was invited in, Jennifer started on a pot of tea. The clock ticked loudly in the otherwise silent room, making the atmosphere feel tense. Jennifer assured Matilda that she didn't need to be a part of this conversation if she didn't feel comfortable, but the brave girl insisted on staying to hear the story. Once the tea was brewed, the three sat together in the living room and Zinnia began her tale.

"Oh Matilda... Where can I even begin? I've learned so much over the last few months, about myself and about the world... Let's see... I guess it all started after we gave you up last year. Harry managed to avoid getting arrested that day and we made it to Guam with no problems. It was lovely there, but nothing seemed to feel right for me. I was angry and bored all the time, more than usual, and it was really starting to make me feel overwhelmed. After a month of that draining feeling not going away, I decided to get some help. I wanted to try therapy, but Harry was dead-set against it since he had it in his head that anyone who needed to talk to a shrink was a wacko. That was the first time I ever realized how in control of my life he really was. Ever since I married Harry, my entire life revolved around him and making sure he was pleased with me as a wife, so I never even realized how unhappy I really was. The more I paid attention, the clearer it became that he didn't love me. I was just this convenient thing to have around and be at his beck and call, and the SECOND I stood up for myself or went against his wishes, he would get angry and yell. He told me that I wasn't allowed to disrespect him since he paid for the house and the food and all my things..."

She paused to dab her eyes with her sleeve, stopping the tears before they could escape. Jen got up to grab the tissue box from the bathroom and offered it to her, sensing that this unfortunate story was far from over. Zinnia took one with a small smile, thanking her for her consideration.

"Anyway, where was I? You have to understand, I had a pretty horrible childhood as well and it made me really ignorant and unpleasant. I've recently learned about something called 'internalized misogyny' and the hurt that gender roles can have on both women AND men and how so many people are victims of it... Not that I'm saying all this to try and excuse my past behavior and the terrible way I raised you because I know that can never be undone..."

She paused again, choking back a sob. Tears flowed freely down her face now, too many for her to hide so she just accepted it.

"Oh, you sweet girl! I'm so sorry! I'm sorry for the years of neglect, of never paying attention to your interests, being too wrapped up in my own dull life to even realize how much you were suffering! I'm sorry for everything!"


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING! Talk of domestic abuse is mentioned. So please don't read if that affects you.

Zinnia managed to compose herself after a few minutes, taking long, deep breaths.

"Sorry about that... I promised myself I was gonna be able to keep it together, but I guess thinking about being here and actually being here are more different than I thought..."

"You don't have to apologize for showing emotion... It's okay..." Jen answered softly, causing Zinnia to blink in surprise.

"Ah... yes, well... I got a bit ahead of myself there... Let me backtrack. Where was I? Oh, yes! Since Harry had put his foot down about the therapy, I decided to look into it myself. Like I said before, I had never done anything in my entire married life that Harry wasn't aware of, so it was a bit exhilarating to go behind his back on this one thing. It was the first time I ever had something that was mine and mine alone, you know? It sounds silly I'm sure, but it made me feel... kinda... powerful. Anyway, I found a lovely, well renowned woman named Gillian and started biweekly sessions with her while Harry thought I was at bingo. I was able to use the small amount of my winnings from the days I ACTUALLY went to bingo and it didn't take me long at all to start opening up. Having someone to talk to and actually pay attention to my problems and feelings was so... nice. It turned out that there were quite a few things that I had blocked out from when I was young. Toxic things... I won't get into the dirty details right now, but she really helped start me on the right direction to becoming a better person. The point is, I learned a lot about how ingrained gender roles really are in our society. I didn't like what I was hearing at first, but the more Gillian told me about it, the more I saw it happening all around me. I was shocked how many times a day women get casually harassed! Not only that, but I started to take notice of how practically EVERYTHING in stores was color-coded in regards to girls, boys, men AND women! How everyone was expected to fit a certain mold in regards to what they should wear, how they should look... It blew my mind how prominent that shi- I mean... STUFF is and I couldn't wrap my head around how I'd never noticed it before. After that eye opening experience, my marriage was doomed from that moment on. I was truly trying my hardest to grow and become a more independent woman, but Harry wanted all of us to stay unchanged forever. It was suffocating! I felt like I was stuck in tar anytime I was in that house. It was like... We moved to an entirely new place, right? Which should have given us the opportunity to start fresh, but all he was interested in was going straight back to selling faulty cars! It was starting to take a significant toll on me. I... started mustering up the courage to ask him for a divorce, but he... he..."

Zinnia trailed off again, her hands trembling all of a sudden. She looked so small and vulnerable that Jen almost reached out to lay a comforting hand on her back, but stopped herself, unsure how open Zinnia was to physical contact.

"He hit me..." came the barely audible whisper.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING! Talk of domestic abuse is mentioned. So please don't read if that affects you.

Jen's eyes went wide as the gravity of Zinnia's confession settled over her. A strange, unfamiliar anger grew in her chest and threatened to spill over. Violence against women and children was the only thing in this world she would not stand for, and her resolve to help was cemented.

"I know this must be difficult to talk about, but are you okay to explain what happened after that?" she said as carefully as she could.

Zinnia nodded, sniffling a few more times before going on.

"Well, as you can probably guess, as soon as I approached him with the word "divorce", he flew into a frenzy. The mere IDEA that his easy little life was in trouble was too much for him to handle... After he back-handed me and I looked into his enraged eyes as he screamed in my face, all I could see was my father with the exact same expression. If my childhood taught me anything, it was that this was only going to get worse and I knew I had to get out of there immediately. Without even grabbing a single thing of mine, I ran as fast and as far as I could and somehow made it to the docks. I had no money and no credit card either, so my only option was hitchhiking, starting with stowing away on a boat to China. Not my preferred style of travel of course, but I had to deal with it. Thankfully, everyone that offered me a ride after that turned out to be real generous, offering me food during those days, and in less than 2 weeks, I was here. One woman even offered me a change of clothes and a shower in her RV, which saved me from showing up here in a filthy state. And they say the rest is history."

The group sat in silence for a few minutes, allowing the situation to sink in. After thinking it over, Jen spoke up.

"Would you mind giving us just a moment?" Jen asked, motioning for Matilda to follow her to the kitchen.

As soon as they were alone, they began to speak in hushed tones as to not make Zinnia feel self-conscious.

"Well, Matilda? I'm perfectly okay with letting her stay for awhile until she gets back on her feet, the house is more than big enough to accommodate after all, but only if you're SURE that you're comfortable with the prospect."

"I think I'll be okay with her being here... I mean, looking back on the violent things da-I mean Harry did, he was definitely the worse of the two. And besides, she seems different this time... I'm interested to see what happens," she finished with a small smile.

Jen smiled back and ruffled her hair, making her giggle. Walking hand-in-hand back to the living room, they gave Zinnia their answer of approval.


	6. Chapter 6

It was starting to get late, so Jen sent Matilda to sleep, leaving the two women alone in the kitchen. After offering Zinnia another cup of tea, they stood in comfortable silence while they sipped their hot beverages gingerly. After a few minutes, Zinnia spoke up.

"I used to be quite smart, you know..." she whispered, a humorless chuckle escaping her lips, "imaginative too, if you can believe it, heh..."

"I can believe it. Every child is born that way. It's up to the parents whether they decide to nurture that spark or stifle the light. I'm sorry that the latter seems to have happened in your case..."

"In regards to me or Matilda?"

Jen considered this, looking Zinnia right in the eye before answering.

"Well, I WAS referring to what I've heard about your childhood so far, but I suppose you have a point that it would be fair to say both. That being said, it's never too late for growth if you make the effort to change. Matilda and I both truly appreciate that you want to make amends. I think she's excited for the chance to get to know you on a closer level. There's a lot about her that I'm sure she'd love to share with you. Children have a wonderful capacity for forgiveness... It's such a beautiful trait."

Zinnia's breath caught in her throat, never hearing someone speak so highly of children before, and she felt moved. If only there was an adult in her life that showed the same gentleness when she was growing up, her life might have been vastly different. There was something about the kindness of this woman, someone she hardly knew, that made her feel safe in this house. She had been so distracted with her own story that she almost forgot that she never bothered to learn her name.

"I'm so sorry... I must have forgotten my manners in all the hubbub. What was your name again?"

Jen let out a small laugh, holding out her hand.

"Jennifer. Jennifer Honey. But you can call me Jen."

"I'm Zinnia Wormwood. But I'll definitely be changing that soon. It's nice to officially make your acquaintance, Jen," she smiled back and shook her hand.

As if by magic, they both yawned at the same time, resulting in more quiet laughter.

"It's been a long day for you I'm sure. Please allow me to show you to your room."

"More than a long day... It's been a long 2 weeks... I appreciate your hospitality and I can't thank you enough... I only hope I can return the favor one day."

They said no more as Jen lead Zinnia to a spacious room on the second floor, just a few doors down from where she slept. Leaving her to make herself at home, Jen closed the door softly and went to get ready for the night.


	7. Chapter 7

The next day was, thankfully, a Saturday, so the three new housemates had the opportunity to sleep in. Jen was the first to wake, so she got started on making breakfast. The smell of bacon and pancakes roused Matilda and she was in the kitchen 2 minutes later. She always helped Jen with setting the table for meals, and the two of them made a great team with the housework. The cooking was almost done and Zinnia hadn't shown up yet, so Jen asked Matilda to finish everything up while she went to check on her. Approaching the room, she knocked softly.

"Zinnia? We're just about to sit down to eat and you're welcome to join us if you like. I made enough for everyone!"

She got no response, but she heard noises coming from the other side of the door, so she opened the door just a crack to see inside. Zinnia was still asleep, but she was tossing and turning violently and moaning in distress. Jen crept quickly to her side as the cries became louder.

"Zinnia? It's okay, it's just a nightmare. You're safe, you're okay, Zinnia..."

She kept her voice low and even as she repeated the soothing words until Zinnia opened her eyes. Still half asleep, she latched onto Jen and began sobbing silently into her shoulder. Jen accepted the embrace and rubbed her back until she calmed down. After a couple minutes, the initial grogginess wore off and reality came crashing in. Now fully awake, Zinnia took in her surroundings, and the realization that she was in Jen's arms slowly sunk in. She jolted back suddenly and a heated blush erupted over her entire face.

"I-I'm sorry... I didn't... I wasn't... Don't take that the wrong way I just... I..." Zinnia sputtered in embarrassment, unable to form a coherent sentence.

Jen's cheeks grew pink at her outburst, and she inwardly reprimanded herself for invading the vulnerable woman's space unannounced.

"No, please. I'm the one who should be sorry. I shouldn't have come in here without permission, you just sounded like you were in pain and I wanted to stop it..."

An awkward silence followed until Jen remembered why she came up in the first place.

"Breakfast!" She burst out unexpectedly, a bit louder than she intended, and they both flinched slightly, "Um... Yes, breakfast. I made plenty for everyone if you'd like to join us. You're more than welcome to borrow a change of clothes as well."

Zinnia nodded, still beet-red and unable to reply. Jen cleared her throat and got up from the bed.

"Well, I'll give you some privacy. Take your time and we'll see you downstairs whenever you're ready."

Jen left the room once more and tried to slow her now fast-beating heart on her way back to the kitchen.


	8. Chapter 8

10 minutes went by after Jen returned to the kitchen, and she was beginning to worry that she may have scared Zinnia off. Before the guilt became too overpowering, there was the sound of foot steps on the staircase. She couldn't help the fluttery feelings of excitement that rose in her chest when Zinnia came into view. It was hard to believe that it had only been 15 hours since they had been officially introduced and already Jen was so happy to see her.

"Welcome! I'm glad you decided to join in! I apologize again for the rude awakening earlier..."

"No, no, it wasn't a rude awakening at all..."

At these words, both women found themselves blushing yet again.

"I mean... I'm just trying to say I was a bit disoriented, that's all... I don't mean anything weird..."

Matilda looked up with a mouthful of pancakes and her eyes moved back and forth between the adults in confusion.

"Weird?" she inquired after swallowing the food.

Zinnia clapped her hands together sharply as a distraction and quickly changed the subject.

"Well! Doesn't it smell just divine in here! I can't even remember the last time I ate a fresh, home-cooked meal!"

And just like that, the moment was forgotten. Zinnia sat down at the table and Jen busied herself by filling her plate with healthy portions. They made casual small talk until everything in sight was devoured. Zinnia offered to help with the clean-up and in just a few minutes, everything was tidy and put away.

"So... Matilda... I'd love to spend a bit of time with you today... If that's okay with you, of course. I want to do what I can to make you feel secure, so Jen, please join us as well. Anything to make sure you're comfortable."

Jen and Matilda exchanged glances.

"It's all up to you, sweetheart. Whatever you want to do."

A slow smile spread across her cheeks, her head already buzzing with fun activities.

"Lets all... GO TO THE ZOO!!"


	9. Chapter 9

Zinnia learned very quickly that Matilda LOVED to talk. She learned more obscure facts on the car ride to the zoo than she had learned in decades. It was refreshing to finally be in the company of educated people for a change, but she still felt a pang of bittersweet nostalgia over her past intelligence. Pushing it away to focus on the now, she endeavored to remember everything that Matilda wanted to teach her.

She knew she had no right to feel this way, but whether she deserved it or not, a bubble of pride warmed her chest as she listened. It was the same scenario when they arrived at the zoo and Matilda urged them to and fro, listing the various traits of every animal they passed. Zinnia couldn't help grinning from ear-to-ear for the entire length of the visit. She had never had so much enjoyment in her whole life! The three of them spent hours talking, laughing, and learning about each other until long after the sun had set.

They never wanted to leave, but alas, the zoo had to close sometime. Matilda was so exhausted from the jam packed day that she fell into a deep sleep as soon as she was back in the car. The high energy of the day took a toll on Jen and Zinnia as well, and they sat in in the silent darkness comfortably for awhile. When they were about halfway from the house, Jen decided to start a conversation.

"So... I'm glad everything went so well. Matilda seemed to be having a blast all day. I'm sure you two will continue to get along swimmingly." she spoke only loud enough to be heard as to not disturb the sleeping girl in the backseat.

Zinnia turned to face her and smiled an easy smile.

"I didn't think it was possible to learn so much in one day, heh.... That girl has got quite the brain. I can't believe I never wanted to see it before..." she sighed dejectedly, "I've got a lot of making-up to do..."

"That may be true, but listen... You have the freedom now. There's no one telling you what to do, no one stopping you from making your own choices... You have all the time in the world to do right by Matilda. She's back in your life and you're back in hers, and it looks like it's going to be for the long run so the only thing to do is move forward. Let's just... take this one day at a time, alright? There's no use trying to guess what the future has in store, but we can all support each other as we adjust to this new existence."

"You're right... Thank you, Jen... Thank you for everything... Not everyone in your position would welcome me into their home so willingly. You're a very kind person for giving me a chance and I... I want to tell you..." she paused and sighed again, "Just... thank you..."

Stopping at a red light, Jen looked over at her and their eyes met. A peculiar tension filled the air and suddenly, the confined space of the vehicle became very apparent. Zinnia shifted in her chair and ever-so-slightly leaned toward Jen's face. Jen gulped and she felt her lips part, her breath coming out in slow, hot puffs. An abrupt snore startled them back to reality and Jen snapped her attention to the traffic lights, which had now turned green, so she eased on the gas pedal.

Just like that, the spell was broken.

After arriving at the house, Jen mumbled a good night and carried Matilda to bed, retreating to her own room shortly after.


	10. Chapter 10

The incident was not brought up again.

Days went by with neither Zinnia nor Jen acknowledging what happened at all. They acted completely natural around each other to the point where both women began to think they had imagined the others interest.

_Did she really lean in to kiss me? Or was I just seeing what I wanted to see?_

These exact same doubtful, insecure thoughts ran through their minds at similar intervals.

However, they were both masters at hiding inner turmoil, so the time spent together was still just as it was before.

Probably just as well, since Matilda was their main priority.

Zinnia managed to get herself the first job she had ever had in her life! Nothing glamorous, just a simple cashier position at the local grocery store, but it made her feel supremely accomplished. She never knew how gratifying it could be to pay for things she wanted with money she had earned herself.

Monday to Friday when Jen and Matilda went to the school for the day, Zinnia was working a shift at the store. The three of them fell into an easy routine, spending almost every evening together, and the days turned into weeks. The housing arrangement was never officially discussed, but Zinnia assumed that she was still welcome to continue living there since they all enjoyed each others company so much.

One Sunday afternoon while Matilda was at a friends house, Jen approached Zinnia with an unexpected request.

"Hey, Zinnia? I know you've mentioned in passing that you have an interest in boxing and wrestling and that sort of thing, and I was a bit curious to see what you like about it... If you ever felt like introducing me to it sometime."

Zinnia's mouth gaped open in shock, but her eyes sparkled with glee,

"YOU want to watch WRESTLING?? Ha! I never thought I'd see the day! Sweet, gentle Ms. Honey is interested in a little violence, huh?"

"Don't tease me, I'm serious!" Jen bristled, face flushed not only from the mocking, but the hidden compliments the mocking disguised.

"Sorry, sorry! I'm just surprised! Pleasantly so, though," she smirked with a wink, "Well, it's Sunday so there might be an episode on tonight! I haven't really been keeping up with it much since I left... Guam... But it was one of the only things that kept me sane in the old days. It means a lot to me and it would be way more fun to get back into it if I had someone watching with me."

"Perfect timing for Matilda to be at a sleepover then! I'll make sure to make us some popcorn for it!" she looked at her watch promptly, "I have to run some errands to run that will take me a couple hours, but I should be back before it starts, I hope!"

"No worries! Have a wonderful afternoon and I'll be waiting!"

After a smile and a quick wave, Jen left the house and drove away.


	11. Chapter 11

It was nearly dusk when Jen arrived back at the house, and a light rainstorm had kicked up right after the sun went down. Zinnia helped her put away everything she bought during her outing, then skipped over to the T.V. to find which channel was showing wrestling. She squealed with elation when she found an episode that was just beginning and sat down eagerly. Jen hurried over with a large bowl of buttered popcorn and got settled comfortably on the couch next to her friend.

It didn't take Jen long to figure out why this sport was so popular, and she let herself enjoy every minute of it. The first fight of the night was so graceful, it reminded her of a dance. But the power that these athletes brought to the art... was nothing short of inspiring. The roar of the crowd was deafening as the smaller of the two men got pinned for a three-count. Jen let out a loud cheer of her own and wrapped her arms around Zinnia's neck, both of them whooping and laughing with glee. The adrenaline wore off slowly as the next match got underway, starting with a vocal face-off between the new contestants. Jen casually untangled her limbs from Zinnia's warm skin, all the while chuckling lightly from the excited energy. They both went a little red in the face and quickly fixed their gazes back to the screen. Suddenly feeling a bit nervous, Jen tried to keep her hands busy, so she reached for another handful of popcorn.

Little did she know that Zinnia had the same idea at the same time, only she was slightly faster, resulting in Jen placing her hand delicately on top of hers. Their eyes locked and neither of them made a move to break the contact. As the rain hit the window repeatedly, the same tension they felt from the car began to wash over them.

And this time they didn't ignore it.

Jen gulped loudly as Zinnia tilted her head towards hers, the intentions unmistakable this time around. Jen found herself leaning back against the couch as her eyes fluttered closed in anticipation, accepting the approach with absolute certainty. Their lips collided with surprising intensity and Zinnia wasted no time running her fingers through Jen's silky hair. The room temperature spiked as they moved their mouths together in blissful pleasure. Zinnia tried to get even closer to Jen's body by deepening the kiss, but Jen gasped, breaking away instantly. Zinnia's expression clouded with concern.

"What's the matter? I didn't hurt you, did I?"

Jen cleared her throat, pushing herself into a straighter posture and adjusting her clothes. After regaining her composure, she took a deep breath.

"No, you didn't hurt me, I'm okay. I just think we need to think about this. There's clearly... SOMETHING growing between us... It might be foolish to rush in without discussing where we want this to lead. It wouldn't just be affecting us, remember. We should talk to Matilda about it as well, see how she feels about the whole thing. I believe it would be inappropriate to go any further unless everyone is comfortable with it."

Jen looked deeply into Zinnia's eyes, conveying how serious she was with a determined glint. Zinnia sighed with a resigned, but amused, grin.

"You're right... Of course you're right. I'm sorry. I seem to have gotten a little too caught up in the moment and ended up getting carried away, but I really DO like you, so I don't wanna ruin anything by moving too fast either..."

Jen smiled sheepishly at the blatant confession.

"I-I like you too... I think it takes a very special woman to make the progress you have, especially coming from such an ignorant upbringing."

Zinnia snorted and shook her head.

"Gee, thanks!" she said with mock disgust.

"I'm sorry! It wasn't my intention to word it that way... I didn't mean to offend..."

Zinnia smirked and placed a finger on her lips.

"I'm just teasing, I know what you mean. I want to do things right this time... On my own terms! Er... And also yours... Our terms..."

"I know what you mean too, silly," Jen giggled, "It's settled then! Tomorrow we'll fill Matilda in on what's going on and get her input."

Jen rested her head on Zinnia's shoulder and turned her attention back to the show. Zinnia took a deep breath filled with contentment, and the two of them finished the episode without another word.

Once it was done, they bid each other good night with a tight hug and both retired to their rooms.


	12. Chapter 12

Jen and Zinnia spent their entire morning figuring out the best way to break the news, with little success. They had every right to be anxious about the possible consequences, since Jen hadn't even broached the subject of her being a lesbian to Matilda in the first place. Not that she was hiding it, of course, it just never really came up in conversation. That being said, there was no doubt in her head that Matilda was already well aware of the different orientations with all the books she read on a daily basis.

The time to pick Matilda up from Lavender's house was drawing nearer, and they were still no closer to devising a game-plan, so they ultimately decided to wing it. Zinnia waited impatiently in the living room while Jen went out, her leg continually bouncing with restlessness. 15 minutes later, Jen and Matilda arrived and came in through the door, Matilda cheerfully chatting away about all the fun she had at the sleepover. The 8 year old was a very intuitive kid, and she sensed the change in atmosphere almost immediately after seeing Zinnia sitting alone on the couch.

"What's going on? Did something bad happen when I was gone?" she asked with concern as she furrowed her brow.

"Nothing BAD happened..." Jen replied gently, "but something DID happen that we need to talk about."

Zinnia held her breath as Matilda sat down on the couch in front of her, a bead of sweat forming on the back of her neck. Jen sat beside Zinnia so that she was able to face her daughter, but they both stiffened from being so close to each other, almost as if Matilda could figure everything out just from that. Fortunately that wasn't the case, and she just kept her expression neutral as she looked back and forth between them expectantly. Jen took the reigns to start the conversation.

"My dear Matilda... I don't even know where to begin... So I guess I'll just come straight out with it. I... I'm a lesbian."

Matilda just blinked, waiting patiently for Jen to continue talking. When it was clear that that was it, Matilda just laughed.

"Is that all? Jeez, you scared me for a minute there! I thought something terrible had happened!"

"That's not exactly... all..." Jen said with hesitation, looking to Zinnia.

Zinnia licked her dry lips, trying desperately to calm her thumping heartbeat by taking a few deep breaths.

"I'm also... Well, you know my entire life was dedicated to "fitting my role", so I never even THOUGHT about any of this until recently but... I think I... I'm also... a lesbian..."

The word felt strange and foreign on her tongue, but in her heart it felt right. Matilda was in awe, an open-mouthed grin taking over her whole face.

"WOOOW!" she exclaimed, "What a coincidence! How on Earth did you discover that you both had that in common??"

"Well, sweetheart..." Jen began, choosing her next words very discreetly, "We wanted to talk to you first, Matilda... To hear your point of view... We... Zinnia and myself that is... we've started to develop feelings... for one another... Which we have agreed to turn into a relationship, with your blessing and ONLY then. So... That's what we're asking now."

The air turned icy as Matilda struggled to grasp this new concept.

"Wait... wait... You LIKE each other...??"

The two woman nodded shyly.

"And you... you want to become a couple, am I hearing that right??"

The young girl's voice was starting to rise in volume, giving Jen a bad feeling. She nodded a second time.

"I... I...!! I don't know about this...! I need to be alone!"

And with that, she jumped up from the couch and stormed upstairs.


	13. Chapter 13

As Zinnia and Jen watched Matilda's back disappear around the corner, Zinnia made to go after her, only to be stopped by a hand on her arm. She looked down to see Jen holding her back and shaking her head.

"Let's just... give her some time... It IS an awfully big change we're asking her to get used to. I imagine she needs to process the idea before we can move forward."

Zinnia stared toward the second floor and sighed sadly, hanging her head with guilt.

"Oh, Jen... I hope we didn't screw things up too drastically... Just when I was getting along with her for the first time too... Maybe we rushed into this..."

"Maybe... but she was bound to find out eventually. She's a clever one, and I would much rather be truthful with her now as opposed to keeping secrets, wouldn't you? Besides... I'm sure she'll be okay with the prospect after thinking it over. I know it will be difficult to wait it out, but we're strong, we can do it," she finished with a playful nudge.

Zinnia nodded and smiled half-heartedly, clearly still uneasy. Jen was also slightly disappointed with how the scenario played out, but she was determined to stay optimistic.

"Come on, you can help me in the garden to take your mind off things for awhile."

Zinnia agreed, so they spent hours outside in the sun, picking weeds and planting new flowers until evening.

Matilda didn't come out of her room once.

It was nearly time for supper and Jen was starting to get genuinely worried. It wasn't the first time Matilda needed space to process her feelings, and Jen usually waited until she came out of her room on her own, but it had never taken this long before. After giving it some thought, she decided to wait a few more minutes, and took that time to start preparing the meal.

"I think I'll take some of this up to Matilda to see how she's doing..." she said to Zinnia when the food was ready.

"Yeah... It might be better to have just one of us there so she doesn't get overwhelmed. Good luck!"

So, with a plate in one hand, she knocked softly on Matilda's door.

"...come in..." came the barely audible reply.

Jen stepped in to find Matilda wrapped in blankets with her nose in a book. She didn't even look up from reading as Jen approached her.

"I brought you a little something... I figured you must be hungry by now."

Matilda didn't respond, so Jen placed it carefully on her bedside table and sat down beside her.

"Sweetie... please tell me what's on your mind. You know you can tell me anything, even things you think I might not like. I know it may seem like an uncomfortable thing to talk about but, occasionally, those are the most important topics to tackle."

A few more seconds passed before Matilda spoke up.

"I guess I... I never imagined anyone would come between us. It's been fun living with Zinnia and meeting her halfway, but I never thought you would care about her more than me..."

"Matilda...! That is NEVER going to happen. You are, and will always be, the most important person in my life. My bond with you is the strongest thing in the world! Just because I have certain feelings for Zinnia does NOT mean they are ever going to surpass how much I care about you!"

Tears filled Matilda's eyes, causing Jen to wrap her arms around her shoulders and stroke her hair, whispering comforting words.

"Silly girl... of course no one could ever replace you in my heart... Listen, nothing has to happen right away. If and when you're ready, we can bring the subject up again. We just wanted to keep you in the loop to where we're at. I'm so sorry it came as a shock."

Matilda sniffled and fidgeted with her sleeve.

"Well... That's not the only thing... I don't even know if upset is the right word to describe how I feel... It's like... an icky, squirming feeling in my stomach... I... I already... I said good-bye to Zinnia as a mother once... I adjusted to it over time until I was in a place where I was okay with it. And now it's like... it feels like you two are asking me to accept her as my mom again and it's making a lot of different emotions swirl inside me...."

"Oh, honey... I'm so sorry... I didn't even consider that... Although, looking back, it should have been obvious..." she sighed, "No one is asking you to do that, I promise. If I'm being honest, we don't even know how serious this is or where it may lead in the future. The plan was to go slow and see what grows over time, but I make a commitment to you right now: If you aren't okay with the idea, that's it. My job is to ensure that you are in an environment that you feel safe in, and if me and Zinnia as a couple makes you feel negative feelings of any kind, we won't become involved, period."

Matilda smiled slightly, wiping her tear-stained face.

"Well... it's still a little scary... but the longer I think about it, the less daunting it seems. I just don't want it to change anything at first, at least between the three of us. I just need a bit more time to absorb everything...  I don't want to stand in the way of your happiness either, so I suppose you two can date... as long as you don't kiss in front of me yet!"

"I think that can be easily arranged," Jen giggled as Matilda scrunched up her face at the thought, "and don't be afraid to communicate either! I want us all to be on the same page and we'll work it out as a team! Now come, let's eat this deliciousness at the table so we don't get your bed all messy. Zinnia has been worried about you too, so I'm sure she'll appreciate seeing your adorable face.

Matilda nodded and unraveled herself from her blankets, hesitance still dancing around her features. Even so, she took Jen's hand and together they left the room.


	14. Chapter 14

The first couple of weeks after breaking the news were, as expected, a little awkward. Jen had relayed Matilda's wishes to Zinnia, and neither of them so much as held hands in her presence. It seemed to help with the transition and Matilda visibly relaxed after the first few days. Even so, when the three of them went out walking together, it would become tense whenever they passed a couple. It was hard for all three of them to possess the knowledge of Jen and Zinnia being together and leave it unsaid. When the two women were alone in the house, they stole swift kisses, but they were terrified of going any further in case Matilda walked in unexpectedly. They continued with this secretive routine for awhile until Matilda spoke up at breakfast one morning.

"Ahem! I have an announcement to make!"

Jen and Zinnia both stopped eating and put their forks down, politely giving their full attention.

"I have officially decided that I've gotten over the fact that you two are dating! The idea has even kind of grown on me. I can see that you're happy together, so you shouldn't feel the need to hide your affection anymore!"

She finished with a dramatic bow, causing all three of them to laugh. Jen's smile faded quickly and a somber expression crossed her face.

"Thank you, sweetie," she began, "I appreciate your acceptance, but there's still a difficult subject to talk about before we become too comfortable."

"What would that be, mom?" Matilda asked with surprise.

"Yes, I'm also quite curious to hear." Zinnia chimed in.

"Well, I've given it a lot of thought recently... Something I know we've been trying to avoid over these past few months... But I think it's about time we all get the proper closure we need."

She looked from Matilda to Zinnia, taking a deep breath.

"Zinnia, you... I mean, technically... You're still married..."


	15. Chapter 15

_You're still married._

With those three little words, reality came crashing down around them, threatening to drown their happy little life in poison.

The clock ticked so loudly in the room, it sounded like a hammer. None of them were able to speak past the bile rising in their throats. The whole scenario mirrored that night when Zinnia first arrived all those months ago. Zinnia began to tremble due to the fact that she hadn't even spared Harry a passing thought in weeks, and now it seemed that she needed to face him yet again.

"I... I can't do it, Jen.... I'm scared... I can't do it alone and I can't stand the thought of you two going anywhere NEAR him... You're both too precious to me, and when I think of what he's capable of..."

She paused, a shiver of dread running over her body.

"I won't do it! I refuse to subject you to him!"

Matilda sat down next to Zinnia and patted her knee while Jen wrapped an arm around her shoulder, each of them supporting her in their own way.

"Listen, Zinnia..." Jen said soothingly, "You won't be alone this time around, I'll make sure of it. I will do whatever it takes to make you feel safe. I can ask around and find a good lawyer to help us out with the legal side of this. If you want to hire some kind of bodyguard for protection, we can do that too. Anything you need. You can do this, I know you can! Then, once you're finally free of his hold for good, we can officially start our life... as a family."

Matilda nodded vigorously and Zinnia's eyes brimmed with tears, gazing between their faces lovingly.

"O-okay... I suppose it was necessary to deal with this eventually, so I might as well get it over and done with."

Jen beamed, allowing herself to place a tiny kiss against Zinnia's cheek. Despite the fear that wracked her heart, Zinnia had all the encouragement she could ever hope for. She needed to fight through her doubts, so she steeled herself and began to plan.


	16. Chapter 16

There were a lot of procedures involved in divorce. Paperwork, lawyers, travel plans back to Guam... Not to mention careful consideration on how they would handle Harry if he got violent. Fortunately, the lawyer that they chose, Tom, just so happened to have martial arts experience, so that gave Zinnia a confidence boost. She had already filled out her portion of the divorce papers, so all that was left was getting Harry to sign his, which would make everything official.

Matilda was so considerate during the whole ordeal, spending most of her time out of the way at Lavender's house so Jen and Zinnia had the focus and privacy they needed to plan. At first, Zinnia was dead-set against the idea of Matilda coming on the trip with them, but Jen and Matilda both ensured her that everything would be just fine. Everything went by in a blur, and before they knew it, they were already sitting in a plane. As soon as it started to take off, Zinnia began sweating and shaking non-stop.

She had managed to keep it together while she kept her mind busy with tasks, but now that she was alone with her thoughts for hours, the situation suddenly became very real. Every mile they flew was another mile closer to potential danger, not just for her, but her newfound love as well. THAT was enough to elevate her terror.

If something went wrong and Harry managed to get a hold of Jen...

The mere thought made her blood run cold...

Harry may not have been very tall, but Zinnia remembered him having plenty of upper body strength. He was very capable of causing serious harm if he got a firm grip on something. She would do whatever it took to keep Jen and Matilda at least 5 feet away from the heathen at all times, even if she had to stand between them.

She needed a distraction, and she needed one now, before her anxiety could spiral any more. She turned her face towards Jen, and Jen met her gaze head on, a gentle smile on her lips. Matilda had fallen asleep for the night, which gave the two women an opportunity to have a conversation.

"You know, Jen... I remember you vividly... from before all this, I mean... I remember the very first time I saw you, like it was yesterday."

Jen tilted her head, tenderness overtaking her expression.

"Is that so?" was all she said, allowing Zinnia to proceed.

"Heh, yeah... I'm sure you probably don't have the same fondness for that memory as I do, if you even remember it, but you made quite an impact on me that night. The thing that stuck with me the most was the way you stood up to Harry when he was mocking people with a good education, fearlessly calling out his lack of respect. I'll admit I was scared for you. I had never seen a woman talk back to him with such confidence, and I was SURE it was gonna set him off. You definitely bristled him, especially when you brought up faulty cars."

Realization dawned on Jen as she thought back, a huge grin spreading over her cheeks.

"Because he WAS selling faulty cars! Oh my goodness, what are the chances that I would mention that?? No wonder he was so angry!"

A look of admiration crossed Zinnia's face.

"But you... you assessed the situation so quickly. You were able to remove yourself from potential escalation... I'm so glad you did. Who knows how different our paths might look if Harry did something stupid and got in trouble with the law? Fortunately, we never have to think of that scenario too much. Anyway, that's why I knew you would be a good guardian to Matilda."

"You... you what?" Jen managed to whisper, emotion causing her voice to break.

"Of course! You think I would have left Matilda with just anyone, even someone she requested? I was inspired by your bravery and your genuine kindness. I knew she would be safe in your care and influence."

Jen's eyes filled with tears and she beckoned Zinnia close, holding her tightly.

"I... I never knew... Thank you for telling me... What you did for her back then... What you did for us, I can never thank you enough for being strong enough to let Matilda go when you knew she would thrive elsewhere. You're a remarkable woman, Zinnia."

"So are you."

Unable to hold back anymore, they allowed themselves one good, honest kiss.

Then, at long last, they began their descent.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Domestic abuse: TW

The first thing the group did upon landing was rent a car in order to take the confrontation straight to the source. Since Zinnia had lived there for almost a year, she was decently familiar with the layout of the neighborhood, so they pulled up in front of Harry's house in no time.

As soon as Zinnia stepped out of the vehicle, she needed to take a few seconds to collect herself. She noticed that Jen and Matilda didn't seem concerned in the least, so she followed their lead and took a deep breath before approaching the entrance.

Tom, Jen, and Matilda stood closely behind as Zinnia rung the bell, and the door opened less than a minute later.

Time seemed to stand still as soon as the ex-lovers laid eyes on each other, and a chill filled the air around them. Furious recognition lit up in Harry's eyes and he took a menacing step forward.  
  
"You!"

His voice dripped with venom, but he reigned himself in when his attention fell on Tom. Taking note of Jen and Matilda as an afterthought, he reassessed the situation and changed his demeanor.

He put on a polite front, but malice still danced behind his eyes.

"What an... unexpected surprise!" he said with feigned delight, "What can I help you all with?"

Zinnia opened her mouth to explain, but fear caused her to stutter so heavily that she could barely get a single word out. Tom sensed her struggle and took over.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Wormwood. I'm here as your wife's lawyer. This will only take a few minutes of your time, so let's have a little chat, shall we?"

Harry's expression darkened, but he managed to smile and invite them to the living room.

"So, I'll save us all a lot of time by just getting to the point. Zinnia has legally signed all the paperwork required to officially end this union. It will be best for everyone involved if you sign your end without defiance, if you please."

Harry was silent for a long time, calculating his reaction. Finally, he let out a deep sigh through his nose and picked up a pen from the table.

"Hand em' over" he stated gruffly.

Zinnia's heart pounded hard in her chest. Could it really be this easy? All that worrying for nothing? She tried not to get her hopes up too high, but her relief was impossible to ignore. She wanted to get out of this place and back home as soon as she could, and if Harry wanted to work with her for once, she wasn't complaining.

She almost wanted to thank him for his complete cooperation, but he was still a dick, so she kept that to herself. After he finished with his signatures, he handed the stack of papers back to Tom, who smiled with satisfaction.

"Thank you for your patronage, Sir. We'll let you get back to your day."

And with that, Tom headed for the door, clearly pleased that it had been so quick. Jen and Matilda stood as well, leaving Harry and Zinnia to share one last glance. She mustered the courage to give him a small smile, then turned around to join her team.

Which is exactly what Harry had been waiting for.

"You _BITCH_!" he screeched as he grabbed a knife from the kitchen counter.

He moved with alarming speed and agility, charging Zinnia with the deadly weapon raised.

She spun to face him in shock, not even having time to scream as the blade approached her heart.

Then Harry froze.

Zinnia blinked down at her ex-husband in confusion, the knife inches from her skin, and slowly realized that he was unable to move a single muscle. She thought for sure she must be dreaming.

Then she noticed Matilda.

The girl was staring directly at Harry with a mask of complete concentration, and Zinnia's face went white. She had no idea how this was happening, but somehow she knew that the precious child was the one holding Harry in place.

She had saved her life.

Jen was already on the phone with the police, and Zinnia heard sirens moments later. With her ears still ringing from the bizarrely surreal experience, she allowed Tom to urgently usher her out of the house to safety. With a final look back at the man who made her life hell, she let the darkness consume her and fell to the ground.


	18. Chapter 18

When Zinnia came to, Jen was standing over her, dabbing her forehead with a wet cloth.

“W-where am I?” she croaked through her dry throat.

“Everything is fine. We just checked into our hotel for the night. Our flight home isn’t till tomorrow, so try to get some rest in the meantime.”

"And Harry...?"

"Arrested. But we can talk more about that when we're back."

Zinnia nodded slowly, still disoriented. Then the memories came flooding back and her eyes shot open,

“Wait! Where’s Matilda?” she sat up fast and looked around the room.

Seeing Matilda sitting on the couch made all her stress disappear.

“Oh, thank God you’re safe! What on Earth happened back there??”

Matilda and Jen exchanged knowing glances. They both sat on the bed and took Zinnia’s hands in their own. Matilda began the tale from the beginning.

First: discovering her powers, then practicing until she mastered them, then, finally using them for the power of good and releasing her school from misery and pain.

Zinnia was dead silent through the whole story, rubbing her head in disbelief.

“I haven’t needed them in a long time, but I figured I would hone my skills before the trip, just in case.” Matilda finished with a shrug.

“I… never imagined it would happen again... I thought it was all in my head…” Zinnia mumbled emotionally, tears starting to streak down her face.

Jen looked confused and Matilda cocked her head, waiting for her to continue.

“I… I know this may be hard to swallow but I.. I used to be able to do it too…" Zinnia squeaked, provoking a loud gasp from the other two.

"Just for a short time! When I was about your age… My father had me convinced that I was imagining it… After enough punishments, it stopped happening, so I believed him that my powers were the fantasies of a stupid child… I never tried to use them again… But… but you…”

She sobbed, wrapping her arms around Jen and Matilda’s necks and squeezing tightly. 

“Not only did you find a guardian who nurtured and supported your gift, but you actually used it to rescue someone who may have eventually caused your gift to be erased. I am so grateful that you became who you are today, and I’m so proud of you for being such a special kid.”

Matilda and Jen were crying now too, and the three of them held each other until the last tear was shed.

Then they all fell asleep for a well deserved break.


	19. Chapter 19

Everything the next morning went by without a hitch, and the three of them arrived home at last.

It gave Zinnia such a strange feeling to return back to her recent routine after having a near death experience. She was stronger, more confident.

Without the ever looming thoughts of being tied to an abuser, she felt more alive than ever before. For the very first time, she was independent enough to plan for a future that SHE wanted with no fear that her past would drag her back down. The air smelled sweeter, the sun looked brighter, and Jen and Matilda seemed more vibrant than ever.

After getting settled and unpacked, they all decided to sit down with a cup of tea and share a proper conversation about yesterday. But it wasn't as easy to start as they thought, and no one had a clue where to begin.

"Well... that was..." Zinnia ventured slowly.

"Certainly eventful..." Jen followed.

"So, what exactly happened after I fainted?"

"Well, Matilda here was able to hold Harry until the police arrived and he was taken straight to prison on the grounds of attempted murder with four witnesses. I'm sure he'll be locked up for a good long time."

Zinnia sighed in relief that that chapter of her life was finally at an end.

"Wow... You know, I've known Harry for many, MANY years, and as awful as he was, I never had him pegged as the kind of man who was capable of..." she swallowed nervously, "killing me..." she finished with a whisper.

Jen and Matilda nodded grimly.

"Well, with the limited interaction I had with him, he didn't strike me as the type to let things go very easily. I can only imagine the anger in his heart after you escaped. How it would have stagnated in his mind with no one to talk to and no where for his emotions to go. At least that's what I think." Jen stated, trying to offer a logical explanation for his actions.

"It's almost sad..." Matilda joined in, "If he wasn't such a stubbornly entitled person, maybe his life could have been different... happy..."

A short silence descended on them as they pondered the 'could-have-beens'. The gloom was soon broken by Zinnia clapping cheerfully.

"Hey now! We only have one life, so let us focus on the good from now on! We can prioritize our happiness together!"

Jen and Matilda both smiled.

"Hey, I have an idea!" Matilda sang, "maybe I can help teach you how to regain your powers! It may be possible if we practice at least a-"

Zinnia cut her off by placing a hand on her head.

"My sweet Matilda... I appreciate your very kind offer, but that part of my life is behind me. I've made my peace with it. Besides, a gift like that is much better cared for in the hands of a child anyway. I'm so grateful that it found its way to such a bright and beautiful child like you.

Matilda nodded with understanding, hugging Zinnia earnestly. Zinnia kissed the top of her head, wiping away a single tear that formed unexpectedly. Jen's heart swelled at seeing her two most special ladies deepening their bond.

"You know what would be fun?" she asked after allowing them to have their moment.

Zinnia sniffled and shook her head while Matilda looked at her quizzically.

"It's been awhile since the three of us were together in the garden! Being surrounded with the flowers and the fresh air is bound to get rid of all our woes!"

Zinnia perked up instantly.

"What a wonderful idea, my little daffodil!"

This resulted in a deep blush from Jen and an embarrassed snort from Matilda.

"Well, what are we waiting for? Time to get to work!"

Zinnia was so giddy all of a sudden, she had to stop herself from twirling around the room.

She was in love, she was safe, she was reunited with her kid...

She was free.

Feeling invincible, she grabbed Jen's hand and kissed it lovingly.

"Well, now that I'm not a Wormwood anymore, being a Honey does have a certain ring to it..."

Jen sputtered, this bold, carefree new attitude was catching her off guard.

Not that she was complaining.

"I'm kidding!" Zinnia burst out laughing, "I'm sorry, I couldn't resist! Your face looks so adorable right now!"

Jen nudged her sheepishly.

"One day I'll get used to your teasing... Good thing we have all the time in the world."

It was Zinnia's turn to blush now and they gazed into each others eye's passionately.

"Um, HELLO??" Matilda brought them back to the present with feigned sternness.

They all laughed together then and happily made their way outside to the garden.

Their life as a family had only just begun.

THE END. 


End file.
